Recovery is a Balancing Act

The concept of letting go can be confusing to many of us. When are we doing too much or trying too hard to control people and outcomes? When are we doing too little? When is what we're doing an appropriate part of taking care of ourselves? What is our responsibility, and what isn't?

Regardless of how long we’ve been in the program, these questions can be difficult for all of us. We sometimes find ourselves playing a very delicate balancing game between letting go of enough to be healthy, but not so much that we fail in what we should be doing for others or ourselves; or taking hold of the reins enough to adequately care for ourselves, but no so much that we attempt to control the actions of others.

The process of recovery isn’t one of perfection, it’s one of progress. That doesn’t mean, however, that we have to be walking around in uncertainty and fear. We can allow ourselves to test the water, to try different approaches, or hold back from taking an action.

Learning to build and keep the healthy boundaries that will aid our recovery isn’t straightforward or easy. We shouldn’t expect that we’ll nail it the first time – or the second, third, fourth, fifth . . .

We don’t have to blindly work everything out within ourselves. We can reach out to others in the recovery community and seek their advice and counsel. There are many, many people who have gone before us, and their stories are full of experiences and growth that we can apply to our own lives.

No matter how confusing it may seem now, have faith, because it will work out in the end. We will find the right path.